Shugo Carrot!
by Fancy Mustache
Summary: This story is basically just Shugo Chara on crack. So if your looking for a good laugh, this story is perfect for you! Please Read & Review!  P.S.. this fanfic has nothing to do with carrots
1. Chapter 1

"That's Legit." and that's my new quote.

Shugo Carrot is basically all of my random moments from school and just random ideas I thought of put into a parody of Shugo Chara. (Which, if you pronounce it correctly, sounds like Shugo Carra, so I added the ending cuz' it sounds like carrot.)

Disclaimer: I don't own Shugo Chara. At all. =.= BUT~ I do own these quotes!

.:.:.

"Tadase-kun… I've had a certain question for some time now…" Hinamori Amu said, slightly blushing and twiddling her thumbs. "Y-yes Amu-Chan? What is it?" Answered Tadase, also slightly blushing. "Well… Where do our eggs come from?" Amu quickly asked, much to Tadase's surprise. "I-I mean… Like, do you like… poop them out when you are sleeping? And if you do, how do they go thru your pajamas? Unless you're not wearing any pants… Or any underwear… but what sick perv sleeps like that?" Amu pondered out loud, earning a sweat drop from everyone in the room. And right on que, Ikuto popped into the room without any pants.

.:.:.

"Amu, are you okay?" Asked Kairi. Amu and Kairi were just discussing something pointless, when Kairi noticed that Amu was acting strange. "OF COURSE IM FINE! And NEVER ask me that AGAIN!" Amu sternly said, giving a death glare. "Just look at what happened to Tina!" she continued. Earning a confused look from Kairi. "Who's Tina?" Kairi asked, not understanding. "EXACTLY." Interjected Amu, with a murderous look.

.:.:.

*a touchy scene where Amu is upsetting a minor character* "WHAT DO YOU KNOW, FISH!" yelled Kanade, a minor character I made up. *slanted camera angle* "THE SLANTY ANGLE NEVER LIES! SOMEONES GONNA RUN AWAY UPSET!" I yell, matter-o-factly. *Kanade runs away upset*

(based off of many episodes from many animes)

.:.:.

"That's Legit." Yelled Yaya, "Like a boss." Muttered Rima, "That's sooo beast!" exclaimed Nagihiko. "I GOTTSA WEINER!" Announced Tadase, uncharacteristically.

.:.:.

"hey… Hey ikuto. Hey! IKUTO!" Screams Yoru, trying to get Ikuto's attention, and successfully does. "GOD DARNINT, RETARD! I TRY TO EAT, MY FRICKING FISH, WILL YOU JUST SHUT… THE HELL…. UP!" Ikuto yells, annoyed… clearly. "…I just wanted to tell you you have no pants on." Pointed out Yoru, slightly disturbed.

.:.:.

That's all I have memorized, I actually have a whole 2 pages full of quotes at school, so I'll do those tomorrow. :D

Sorry its not good, but I promise next chapter… will be… *thinking* EPIC! *sparkles*


	2. Chapter 2

YELLOW~!

Im back with my next chapter! But, as i have stated in the previous chapter, the whole layout will be different because I wrote these mostly in quote form in my notebook. All of these quotes were said by people (mostly me) in school, so they are not copyrighted. But shugo chara is, and I don't own it. :D

P.s. there is some swearing in this chapter

.:.:.

Tadase: *talking about Amu* Yea… I haven't seen her lately…

Kukai: That sounds wrong…

Tadase: I-I mean like, physically seen her… n-not… yea… *Serious*

Kukai: …

Tadase: N-NO! I DON'T MEAN PHYSICALLY! I MEAN VISUALLY!

Kukai: … That's nasty...

.:.:.

Setting: In a classroom, students are working in groups and were given several objects (in a paper bag) to make a story out of.

The group we are talking about is composed of: Tadase, Amu, Yaya, and Rima.

Yaya: I vote we make the plot take place in a port-o-potty!

Rima: Great… stranded in a port-o-potty…

Tadase: I think that's a great idea.

Amu: Sure! Sounds like it will be funny!

Tadase: So we have a popsickle stick, eraser cap, a bag, a tissue, a cotton ball, and a Hershey kiss.  
>Amu: … If you find a chocolate kiss in a port-o-potty, don't eat it. If your tempted, make sure its chocolate first.<p>

.:.:.

*Kukai is hiding his twinkies he has recently bought from Yaya*

Amu: HIDE YOUR TWINKIE, KUKAI!

Yaya: *wasn't paying attention, but now is* SAY, WHAAA?

Nagihiko: Oh, I've seen his twinkie several times. No use hiding it now.

.:.:.

(Pretend Ikuto is in the Guardians school and was in one of their classes)

Setting: In Science class, and are discussing a picture of a hurricane (Katrina).

Ikuto: oooh, Tadase. [Hurricane] Katrina is your kinda girl! Big, white, wet, and has a nice big hole.

Tadase: *pimp slap*

.:.:.

Ikuto: Fuck YOU!

Kukai: Ehy, save it for your mom!

.:.:.

Kukai: *steals Tadase's twinkie*

Tadase: *chasing Kukai around* GIVE IT BACK!

Kukai: NOOOOO *runs*

_3 min. later_

Tadase: *has twinkie, but a bite was taken out by Kukai* … Why did you steal my twinkie?

Kukai: *shrugs* Cuz' I wanted to be an ass.

.:.:.

Tadase: *talking to Amu* I like your hairpin.

Nagihiko: *somewhere unseen* I like poop.

.:.:.

Tadase, in his purple daisy dukes and glittery green tube top, was doing the lift with Amu. Her stripped neon pink and yellow shirt glittered under the disco ball.

.:.:.

Sorry its not very funny, but there are some… interesting… moments. :D

Nxt chap will be up soon! THE MORE GOOD REVIEWS, THE SOONER!


	3. Chapter 3

Another chapter of randomness! Yay~

.:.:.

Lulu: Howdy, y'all!  
>Ikuto: *confused* Wait... Is she Russian?<p>

.:.:. 

Amu has been busy all day studying for a big test coming up. Bored, Amu sighed to herself. "This problem is so… special…" complained Amu, giving a melancholic glance to Kukai who was playing with a knap-sack in the corner. Zoned out, Kukai replied, "If you think that's special, you should see my mom" 

.:.:.

Me: This is Nagihiko's festive scarf; he wears it to parties... And gay bars.

Nagihiko: O.O …WHO TOLD YOU?

.:.:.

Tadase: OH SAINT FRANCIS, YOUR PRETZLES ARE FREEZING!

.:.:.

Utau tossed her kids out so they could build character.

.:.:. 

Setting: Tanabata

"Hello everybody! I have our bamboo tree!" Announced Tadase as he entered the Royal garden, carrying an odd looking tree. Kairi looked at him annoyed, and smart-butted commented saying, "If that's a bamboo tree, my mom has balls." 

.:.:.

After Yaya was annoying in class, the teacher put a dunce sign around her neck

Rima: "The dunce sign really brings out the color of your eyes."  
>Yaya: =.= Shuddup. <p>

.:.:.

Ikuto: *laying in bed*  
>Amu: *comes in* get up!<br>Ikuto: No! I can't overcome my inertia!  
>Amu: *kicks bed*<br>Ikuto: *rolls out of bed* my inertia has been overcome. 

.:.:. 

Amu to Ikuto: Imma knock you up! And not in the way you want it!

.:.:.

Amu: I had a dream last night!

Ikuto: Okay, Martian luther king.

.:.:.

Kukai: Holding your bladder and holding a marble are the same thing, one wrong move and it could slip. (fail) 

.:.:.

Ikuto: *knocks on Amu's door*  
>Amu: It's that damn telemarketer again! We don't care about your latest condom endorsement!<p>

.:.:.

Utau: I look like lady gaga... Quick! Buy me a meat dress!

.:.:.

Kukai: Why do u think twilights so popular?

Amu: Apparently, twilights popular because teens can relate to it. "oh, yea, I remember that time when I was a vampire."

Nagihiko: Sexy glittering men? WHAT'S NOT TO LOVE? Sparkles, FTW!

.:.:.

Not very funny this time around, its hard to concentrate cuz' my sisters watching Gnomeo and Juliet… .

PLEASE REVIEW! 


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